The Fear You Won't Fall
by marsh king's daughter
Summary: Sora Hikari was only supposed to live the life his parents had chosen for him...falling in love with his male tutor had never been part of the plan.  [Riku x Sora]  Part 1 of 2  YAOI


**Disclaimer:** Like anybody would pay me for _this_…don't own Kingdom Hearts, never will…or _will_ I? –shifty eyes- And randomly chosen song lyrics are "What If You" by Joshua Radin. I dunno…first one that popped into my head that was sort of lullaby-y without actually getting the rockabye baby vibe going.

**Warnings:** Slight language and…lemon in part two. I'm not sure if you should look forward to it or scurry away in fear. I know I'll be doing the latter.

Now, onto the magical font decorations that were the result of my initial writer's block! -snickers- Is it weird that it helps? O.o

oOoOo

**t**he** f e a r **you won't** f a l l**

**p**art **o n e**

oOoOo

_We're only trying to find ourselves._

A d o l e s c e n c e: a period of time where self-identity is crucial in making your next choices in life.

For Sora Hikari, however, plans for the future were predetermined.

It wasn't what you would call a _bad _life, per say. Some might even be rather envious of his position. But from Sora's perspective, it was the suffocating, unalterable path that he would never be allowed to stray from.

His father, a powerful, rather intimidating man, happened to be the owner of a now internationally-wide hotel chain, a business that Sora was expected to carry on when he gained enough experience to take over. From doing this, of course, he would become just as well-known as his father (if not more), and hugely successful, wealthier than he could imagine (enter the jealous bystanders), and in want of nothing.

Except, of course, making his _own_ decisions.

In the end, it all came down to keeping up appearances: Go to the perfect university, marry the perfect girl, and continue the family business, all for the sake of the name "Hikari".

And for as long as he could remember, perfection had been decided for Sora as well.

Her name was Kairi Nakamura, and she was, in every sense of the word,_ perfect_. She went to a prestigious all-girls' school where she was at the top of her class, excelling in every area of studies and curricular. She was known for her gentle singing voice, flawless piano-playing, extraordinary cooking, sewing, and every other skill that would guarantee her to be the best wife and mother a man could ask for.

She was exceedingly sweet as well, which made it rather difficult for Sora to find the incentive in him to break her heart.

Their families had known each other for generations, and when the long-awaited day had arrived that marked a daughter and son of the same age from each, it was a chance that wasn't going to be let pass. Therefore, by the age of seventeen, Sora Hikari and Kairi Nakamura were practically engaged.

It wasn't as though Sora didn't _like_ her; in fact, he found it impossible to do so. But he was far from being in love with her, and he couldn't help but have the sneaking suspicion that it was unlikely to ever happen.

However, it seemed fairly obvious that the petite redhead was highly infatuated with _him_. They had known each other since childhood (probably birth, to be more precise, since neither could recall their first meeting), and what followed were countless formal family gatherings, imposed upon them rather forcibly. Over time, Sora began to notice the amount of smiles he received from her greatly increasing in number, the way she had begun to flutter her eyelashes at him a few years ago, and various other flirtatious techniques ("accidentally" brushing his hand, "unknowingly" stumbling upon him alone somewhere) that were rather lacking in subtlety.

And he was flattered, really. _Any_ boy in his right mind would be flattered to received undying attention from the effervescent _Kairi_. But it also fed Sora's concerns, knowing that if he had any chance of making his own decisions in life, it would be much easier if the violet-eyed girl was also opposed to the prospect of their future marriage. However, if she _did_ have feelings for him, there was little chance that his father would agree to him finding his _own_bride, a great offense to the entire Nakamura family and perhaps a reason to sever all ties.

Therefore, he accepted his fate in silence, weakly returning the redhead's dazzling smiles and striking up polite conversation with her sans hesitation.

He might as well get to know his fiancée, after all.

A certain other aspect of his foreordained destiny wasn't quite as simple to achieve, however.

And_ that_ was college.

Most teenagers, in their junior year of high school, are busy filling out applications to various universities across the country, ranging from safety schools to ones that might be a bit of a stretch. Sora however, was applying to _one_.

And it wasn't just "a bit of a stretch" for him.

It was _impossible_.

Which caused both him and his guidance counselor to have some rather unsettling concerns, to say the least.

Sora wasn't exactly a bad student, he just wasn't terribly bright. Average, at best, but with good intentions. He always paid attention in class, took detailed notes, and turned every last assignment in on time, along with having a perfect attendance record. It wasn't as if he didn't _try_. On the contrary, he might've been trying harder than the best in his class. But when it came to studying, the brunet was lost.

Horribly, horribly, lost.

There was always the last resort of bribery, as his father had "discretely" reminded him when his final exam results of sophomore year had arrived. This was true, of course. With a rather generous donation from his father (an alum), it was likely that a few strings could be pulled on Sora's behalf.

But getting into that college was the one part of his future that he _did_ want, that he was working for. It was the best of the best, and he could study in every field imaginable there. So he would do whatever it takes to get in on his own, without the slightest bit of "bribery".

It started with cram school.

This consisted of extra classes, three nights a week, with additional assignments and mock exams every now and then. It didn't take long, however, to see that this was backfiring. It only added to Sora's stress and fatigue, resulting in a downward spiral of his regular school experience.

So cram school ended, and tutoring took its place.

And that's where the real story begins.

oOoOo

First impressions aren't everything. At least, that's what Sora had been taught in the first grade when he had received the whole "Don't judge a book by its cover" speech that everyone is given early on in life.

Most of the six and seven year olds in his class had pretty readily accepted this of course, Sora included. It only takes some years of experience to realize that this contradicts several aspects of life, high school especially, including stereotypes, cliques, and love at first sight.

And sometimes you simply encounter someone who gives you a feeling you just can't shake.

This was the case with Riku Sugisaki.

From the moment he stepped through the pristine glass door into the grand foyer, it was clear that this boy was no ordinary guest.

He certainly had enough presence (in fact, through Sora's eyes, he put the rather ostentatious decoration of the entryway to shame), but there was something about him that just seemed…out of place.

Of course, he managed perfection in his own way. He was tall and slender, yet extremely well-built, the type who probably attracted countless modeling scouts and sent girls swooning. Long (_Was that really silver?_) silky-looking hair hit just past his shoulders, while wispy bangs framed his flawless features. Which were, of course, stunningly unique, every contour of his face running smoothly together, even his current expression of general disinterest bringing an inexplicable allure to full pink lips, perfectly sculpted cheekbones, warm, aquamarine eyes…

It took quite a prolonged period of time for Sora to realize with embarrassment that he was (and quite undeniably so) staring. Luckily, from his vantage point at the top of the spiraling marble staircase, the older boy had not caught him in the act.

Snapping out of his daze, the brunet watched as the maid who had let the boy inside offered to take his coat, to which he complied, murmuring a soft thanks which Sora could barely make out.

Then, with the soft clicking of heels on hardwood flooring, Sora's mother swept into view, who greeted the stranger with a warm smile. Seiya Hikari was a stunning and intelligent woman who had captured his father's heart unexpectedly when all he had been looking for was an accountant. What he ended up with was a loving wife and sharp-minded financial manager for their business. "A match made in heaven" as their friends lovingly called it.

"Riku!" Sora heard her say brightly. "My, you've grown so much since the last time I've seen you! Tell me, how are your parents?"

"They're great, Mrs. Hikari, thank you," the silver-haired boy replied, flashing a charming smile. "They asked me to send their regards."

"Oh, do tell them I send mine as well. It's really a shame that Leon isn't here…I know he was looking forward to hearing all about how you're liking college so far," Seiya said genially. "We really must get together some time and catch up when you're parents are in the area."

The boy nodded, saying, "I'm sure they'd love to." Then he looked around thoughtfully, adding, "Is he…?"

"Oh, yes," the woman chuckled. "I nearly forgot. Sora! Your new tutor's here, sweetie!" she called in a louder voice.

Sora's eyes widened and he slid down the wall, a precaution to avoid being caught eavesdropping. That…that _godly _figure…was his tutor?

And had his mother really just called him "sweetie" in front of him?

Clearing his throat, he got up again, allowing a nonchalant expression to wash over his face as he made his way downstairs, pretending that he had no idea that this ridiculously attractive boy had been in his house for nearly ten minutes.

Still, it was a rather daunting task to approach the silveret as he realized too late that he was dressed in an unimpressive ensemble of a t-shirt and faded blue jeans, spiky brown hair as hopeless as ever.

Of course, his mother _had_ mentioned the night before that his new tutor would be coming over to meet him today, but he had been expecting the geeky, bookish type, not the boy standing before him who was so far from it.

Damn stereotypes.

_And now I'm staring again_, the brunet realized in a jolt, smiling nervously under his mother's and the boy's curious gazes. "Um…hi," he said lamely, at a loss for words. _Wow, way to be eloquent in front of the stranger who probably already thinks you're in idiot, Sora._

"Hello," the older boy returned, without missing a beat. "I'm Riku Sugisaki, I'll be tutoring you from now on," he said, offering a hand.

"S-Sora Hikari," the brunet replied, nervously reaching out and praying to God that his palms weren't sweaty. However, the only thing he felt as the boy's hand closed around his was a pleasant, tingling warmth, starting at his fingertips and gradually spreading throughout his entire body until they pulled away.

"You two met once before a _very_ long time ago," Seiya said. "Must've been…about two and four, respectively," she continued, a reminiscent smile on her face. Then she turned to her son, explaining, "Riku's parents have been friends of ours for a very long time, but they moved to be closer to family. Riku's come back to attend college here, though, and we just thought he'd make a wonderful tutor for you."

"O-oh, um…thanks very much," Sora mumbled. "I hope it's not too much trouble."

"Not at all," the older boy replied easily.

The brunet's mother beamed at them for a moment before chirping, "Well I'll let you two get to work then. Really, thank you, Riku."

"It's my pleasure," Riku insisted. "Really," he added. To Sora he said, "Shall we get started then?"

"Er…yeah. My room's upstairs," the smaller boy told him. After awkwardly remaining rooted to the spot for a moment, he stiffly made his way back up the staircase, hearing Riku's footfalls behind him.

"So, what are you having the most difficulty with?" the silver-haired boy asked as they entered the spacious bedroom, watching Sora flick the lights on.

"Huh?" the brunet asked, giving him a blank stare.

"In school," Riku elaborated.

Sora could feel his cheeks heating up, feeling like a complete idiot. "Um…A.P U.S."

"History's not your strong point, then?" the older boy mused, as the brunet shuffled over to his desk, wishing that he had thought of bringing in an extra chair.

"It's my favorite subject, actually," Sora sighed. "But I'm terrible with memorization. Um…should I get you a chair or-?"

"The bed's fine," Riku smiled, sitting down on the foot of it without any invitation. "But thanks."

"Sure," the brunet murmured, plopping down heavily on his chair and absently spinning left to right. "So…how should we start, exactly?"

"Well I don't expect to actually get anything done today," the older boy said, staring intently at Sora. "I just want you to tell me about yourself. Study habits, things you need help with, things you're good at…" he trailed off. _And was that smirk supposed to look suggestive?_

"U-um, right. I guess I just sort of read over my notes and…" the brunet said, searching his brain for anything else.

"Hmm. You know, some people don't really process information if they're only reading it. It's called passive learning," Riku explained. "You can try copying over your notes, flash cards…even studying with someone else can help retain information better."

"O-okay. I'll try that, then," Sora said, feeling increasingly nervous with that unwavering gaze locked on him.

A moment of uncomfortable silence passed, before the silveret asked softly, "Is there a reason you're only applying to the most prestigious school in the country?"

The brunet hesitated, finally answering, "My parents want me to."

Riku raised an eyebrow. "And that's all?"

"Well, I do want to get in, really. But I'm just…I'd never get accepted," Sora confessed, smiling sadly.

"Look…Sora," the older boy began. "To be honest, with your current grades, it's extremely unlikely. Of course, I'm getting paid to do something about that, but there's still no guarantee. Don't you want to at least have other options?"

The brunet blinked. _Other options?_ "There, uh…there _are_no other options. I have to get in, one way or another," he muttered, scowling.

"It's your life," Riku murmured.

Sora's scowl only increased. "I really don't think it's any of your business."

The silveret laughed darkly. "Believe me, kid, I've been in your shoes before. The chosen career path, arranged marriage…you're never going to get decent marks if _those _are your incentives."

"Well, I'm sorry, but I don't _have _any other incentives at the moment," the smaller boy countered.

"Really?" Riku said incredulously. "So if suddenly your parents changed their minds and told you that you could do whatever you wanted with your life, you'd have no ideas?"

"Like_ that'd _ever happen," Sora muttered.

"Hypothetically speaking, of course," the silver-haired boy allowed with a sigh. "Or, even better, let's say that _you _tell them you won't go through with it. What would you do instead?"

The brunet closed his eyes, remaining silent. Of course, he had been through that scenario _countless _times in his head before, but it all ended with a harsh return to reality…they'd never allow it. "I…I've always wanted to be a teacher," he said finally, voice quiet. "I really like kids…always wished I had a little brother or sister. If I could choose…that's what I'd want to be."

Riku didn't say anything for awhile, just continued staring at him, eyes bright. Sora felt his cheeks heat up again and looked away, adding, "O-only hypothetically speaking, of course!"

"Of course," the silver-haired boy repeated, smiling though Sora couldn't see it. "You'd make a good teacher." The brunet turned to him, expression uncertain. "Hypothetically speaking."

The smaller boy allowed a small smile. "Thank you."

oOoOo

Sora wasn't quite sure if he looked forward to his study sessions with Riku or dreaded them, he just knew that they caused an odd fluttery sensation in the pit of his stomach. The part that mattered to his parents, however, was the fact that slowly but surely, his grades were improving. Although the older boy constantly teased and chided him, he was extremely patient with the brunet, and fortunately it seemed to be paying off.

The only thing Sora wished he could put to an end was the ceaseless encouragement for him to confront his parents. When the tutoring had first started, usually a long, cold glare was enough to silence Riku for awhile, but now that they were becoming more familiar the silveret was also becoming much more persistent.

"It couldn't hurt to at least tell them you're unhappy."

"D-Day…June 6, 1944…" Sora kept mumbling to himself, hoping that for once Riku might shut himself up.

And it worked…seemingly, anyway. Then, "What's she like?"

"What's_ who _like?" the brunet snapped in irritation, looking up from his flash card.

"Jeez," Riku said. "What's with the sudden stick up your ass?"

"My mid-terms are in _two weeks_, Riku! You're not getting paid to ask me stupid questions!" Sora said, obviously tense.

"It's a perfectly legitimate question," the older boy said. "I'm talking about _her_. The one you're set up to marry and all."

The brunet eyed him momentarily, then immediately bent back over the desk, muttering, "Allied invasion of Normandy…"

"She must be pretty impressive, huh? To be good enough for a Hikari…" Riku murmured, leaning closer to Sora, causing the boy to jump. "Do you like her?" he asked curiously, expression thoughtful.

"K-Kairi?" the younger boy squeaked, head swimming from their sudden proximity. "Y-yeah, she, uh…" _Oh God, Riku's breath…_"Smells…nice…" Sora sighed, then realized what he had said just as Riku burst out into peals of melodic laughter.

"She _smells_ nice? Not exactly what I was looking for, but okay," he chuckled, pulling back.

"Th-that's not what I meant to say!" the brunet stammered. "She…she doesn't…w-well I wouldn't know, but…" he ended with a distressed noise in the back of his throat, unable to think of any other excuses.

"And what did you mean to say?" Riku asked softly.

Sora didn't answer for a moment, absently twirling his pencils in his fingers. "Kairi's a really great girl…I'd be lucky to marry her."

"If you loved her," the older boy stated, finishing Sora's unspoken thoughts.

The smaller boy looked at him, finding aquamarine eyes staring off into the distance, slightly clouded. "The girl I was supposed to marry," he began quietly, "was a 'great girl' as well. In fact, I tried to convince myself that I was in love with her. But I always knew I was just lying to myself," he murmured. "One day, my parents asked me to officially propose after I graduated high school. I was fucking eighteen years old, and they already wanted to seal my fate," he said darkly.

"But I did it…I asked her to marry me, because I thought that I didn't have any other choice. She…Namine was her name...she started crying, though…told me she was in love with someone else and that she couldn't accept it. I didn't really know what to think at first…I never thought that she would refuse. But then we went back, and she talked to her parents…and they listened to her, they respected her decision. It was like a wakeup call for me…I knew that I could take my life into my own hands, and start making my_own _choices, my _own_ plans. You have to do it, Sora, if you ever want to be happy," he finished, gently placing a hand on the brunet's shoulder.

"B-but, Kairi she…I think she loves me," Sora whispered. "I can't do that to her…"

"And what happens when you fall in love with someone else, then?" Riku countered. "You'll just let that person go so that you can make your parents happy?"

"I don't know, okay?" the brunet said, raising his voice. "I don't know!" He squeezed his eyes shut, confused by the sudden sting. He had accepted his fate, it was okay…he could make everyone else happy that way…

"Sora," the older boy sighed, gently raising his hand from the brunet's shoulder to cup his cheek. "You don't have to know what you're doing. You're seventeen years old. You _shouldn't_ know what the rest of your life is going to be like. It's okay to get scared sometimes…and it's okay to be selfish. Just once…try doing something for yourself. I promise you won't regret it."

oOoOo

Despite Riku's advice, the more pressing matter of upcoming exams captured Sora's attention, and he continued to put off a confrontation. If things went badly and he found out he really_ didn't _have any choice…well, he couldn't help but suspect that that would probably be reflected on his midterm grades.

When he pointed this out to the silveret, it was accepted with a begrudging sigh, which was probably the best the boy could've hoped for. They continued their regular study routine, although Sora was growing more and more stressed as the exam days approached. It was exactly three days before when Kairi came to visit.

"Um…Riku, I don't understand this problem," Sora whined, pointing at the page in his Pre-Cal book that the older boy had told him to review.

"Let me see," the silver-haired boy said, peering over his shoulder and resting his palms on the desk, causing Sora to be trapped by the boy's arms, much to his dismay. "Well, you're solving for…" _Ah, how am I supposed to concentrate when his voice is right in my ear?_

It wasn't the knock on the door that snapped Sora out of his daze. Rather, it was the absence of Riku's voice when _he_ stopped at the sound. The silveret straightened up, noticing the brunet's confusion and saying bemusedly, "Come in."

Sora started, spinning in his seat as the door opened hesitantly and revealed the pretty auburn-haired girl. "U-um, hello," she said shyly, nodding to both boys. "I didn't mean to interrupt, but…we made cookies today in home economics, and I thought it might cheer you up a bit. Since I know you like sweets and all," she said, holding out a small white box neatly tied with a pink ribbon.

"O-oh, um, thanks very much!" the brunet stammered, jumping up from his seat to accept the gift. "That was very thoughtful…"

Kairi giggled as she handed him the sweets. "You're welcome. I should get going then, so that you can continue your studying. Good luck with your exams," she murmured, standing on her tiptoes to plant a chaste kiss to the boy's cheek. "Bye, Sora," she said with a bright smile and faint blush.

"R-right, thanks, Kai. B-bye," Sora said in a very unnatural sounding voice as his own face heated up.

With a small wave the redhead left, and the brunet stared at the empty spot where she had been for a moment before shaking his head and closing the door.

"So," Riku said, raising his eyebrows as Sora whirled around to face him, having momentarily forgotten his presence. "Looks like maybe you're not all that opposed to marrying her after all."

"W-what? No! Kairi's just…a friend," the brunet muttered. "I don't have any feelings for her."

"And the longer you drag it out with her, the more feelings she'll have for you," the older boy said, eyes narrowing.

Sora glared back, arms crossing in front of his chest. "Just drop it, Riku."

"Why? So that you can just keep doing what everyone else tells-,"

"SHUT UP!" the brunet yelled suddenly, with more force than Riku had anticipated coming from the small boy. "Just shut up, okay?"

The older boy opened his mouth to argue but was cut off again as Sora continued his rant. "You…you're just as bad as the rest of them. You're always telling me exactly how I should live my life, and yeah, maybe it's different from everyone else's opinion and maybe it _is _the right thing to do, but just for once Riku, I want people to stop telling me what to do so that I _can _decide for myself," the brunet finished, breathing heavily as his eyes misted over.

Riku remained silent, lips pursed, and finally Sora murmured, "Can you please just go now? I…I don't feel like studying anymore."

"Fine," the silver-haired boy said, walking towards the door. "I guess I shouldn't bother telling you 'good luck' since it was probably enough hearing it from Kairi, huh?" he said coldly. "I'll see you when your results come in. Bye, Sora."

And with that, he was gone.

oOoOo

It had been a stupid, stupid mistake, to say the least.

What he had been trying to avoid with a parental confrontation had simply happened with his tutor instead, and Sora knew from the moment he stepped into school on the first day of his exams that they were_not_ going to go well.

Unfortunately, there wasn't even a sense of relief after having taken all of them, because now he would only be spending most of his winter break dreading the results. And the one person who understood him and who he could confide in wouldn't be there beforehand to assure him that it would be okay…

It was strange…it had only been two months since Riku had started tutoring him, but it felt like much longer than that, and Sora had become used to having him around. Suddenly he missed the older boy, the way he had made the brunet's life so much more unpredictable, the way he had tried so hard just to help him…

He had only been trying to help him.

"Mom! Mom, where are you?" the brunet yelled, scrambling down the stairs. He rushed into the living room, where Seiya looked up from the newspaper in surprise.

"What's wrong, honey?" she asked as he came to a halt in front of her.

"Do you have…Riku's phone number?" the boy asked urgently, in between pants.

"Of course, Sora," his mother told him. "Why do you need it so badly?" she inquired with a curious smile.

"I just…messed up a bit."

oOoOo

"So, what's so important that you couldn't tell me over the phone?" came a familiar voice, startling the brunet who was sitting on a park bench in town where they had agreed to meet.

Sora looked up, finding that it felt like it had been much longer than a week since he had last seen the silver-haired boy. "I wanted to apologize," he murmured, breath coming out in smoky puffs in the cold.

"Well, I won't accept it," Riku replied, sitting down heavily next to the brunet.

"W-what?" the smaller boy spluttered, not expecting this at all.

"I'm not going to accept your apology…because you were right, Sora," the taller boy continued, much to the brunet's surprise. "I was being a complete hypocrite, telling you what I wanted you to do…and I'm sorry."

"O-oh…it's okay," Sora said quietly. "Thank you."

Riku smiled. "No problem. So…how did the exams go?"

Sora made a face, causing the older boy to laugh. "I wasn't exactly concentrating. Guess I'm pretty hopeless without you."

The older boy grinned. "Sora, I think you'll _always_ be hopeless."

"Gee, thanks," the brunet muttered.

"Any time," Riku replied easily.

"Hey…Riku?"

"Yeah?"

"When…when I tell my parents," Sora began. "Would you mind…being there? For…for moral support, y'know."

The older boy gave Sora's hand a comforting squeeze. "I'd love to."

oOoOo

He had asked Riku to come over the day after, but perhaps staying outside in the cold for a prolonged period of time hadn't been the best idea in hindsight. He had woken up feeling completely miserable, and after a quick check with the thermometer, confirmed that he was definitely not going to be changing his future plans in his current state.

"Jeez, Sora, you make a commitment and then you just coincidentally end up in bed with a fever? How do I know you're not faking it?"

"Shut up, Riku," Sora mumbled, weakly glaring at the boy from where he was buried under his comforter.

To Sora's surprise, the older boy threw himself down on the other side of the large bed, bouncing the mattress and rolling over to grin at Sora.

"I-I'm probably contagious, you know," the brunet said nervously, not sure if his haze was entirely from the fever or if part of it came from Riku's close presence.

"That's okay," the silver-haired boy said dismissively. "It's winter break anyway."

"That's right," Sora mumbled. "Shouldn't you be home?"

"My parents are swamped with work right now," Riku sighed. "But it's more fun to stay here with you anyway," he said, smiling.

Azure eyes widened and once again, Sora wasn't sure if the heat he was feeling was because he was sick or because of the other boy. "I-I'm going to sleep!" he proclaimed, rolling over to face the wall.

This only caused Riku to shift closer to him however, Sora's heartbeat quickly speeding up as the boy murmured softly in his ear, "Should I sing you a lullaby?"

"I-I'm not a little kid," the brunet said, squeezing his eyes shut as he tried to focus on something other than the breath tickling the back of his neck.

"Doesn't mean you can't have someone sing you to sleep," the older boy chuckled, low and warm in Sora's ear.

When Sora didn't respond, he began, singing softly,

_So, for tonight_

_I'll stay here with you_

_Yes, for tonight_

_I'll lay here with you_

"You have a nice voice," the younger boy sighed sleepily, nuzzling deeper under the covers.

Riku laughed. "Well I have to, if I'm going to become a singer."

"You're going to be a singer?" Sora asked, quickly rolling back over before realizing that this was a big mistake, as Riku's surprised face was now merely centimeters away from his own. "Er, sorry!" he squeaked, scooting back.

The older boy gave him a warm smile, murmuring, "I didn't tell you?"

"No," Sora mumbled.

Riku didn't say anything else for awhile, just started humming and playing with the smaller boy's hair. The brunet leaned into his touch, enjoying the feel of cool skin against his own. "I was supposed to be some big corporate manager," he said quietly after awhile. "It would've been a much more stable job, of course, and a lot better paying," he chuckled. "But…I don't know. If I can make an impact, even on just one person…it'll be worth it."

Sora smiled, closing his eyes. "Then it's already worth it."

"Oh?" Riku smirked. "You must be thinking how cool I am then, huh?"

"No," the brunet lied, grinning.

"Just admit it, Sor," the older boy began in a teasing voice, nuzzling into the crook of his neck, "You like me."

"N-noo," Sora mewed, eyes fluttering back open despite how heavy his eyelids felt.

"Really?" Riku asked, pulling away to hover over the smaller boy. "So…you don't find me attractive at all?"

"W-we're both guys, Riku. Don't be stupid," the brunet said, dodging the question.

"Well," the silveret said. "I think you're cute."

"W-what?" Sora squeaked. "Stop…messing around."

"Fine," Riku sighed after a moment. "But…once you break things off with Kairi, I've got something to tell you, okay?"

"Okay," the brunet frowned, brain not really thinking through his sentence in his poor state. "Now will you please let me sleep?"

"Sure," the older boy acquiesced. "Good night, Sora."

"G'night," Sora mumbled in reply, light snoring filling the room a few minutes later.

Riku bent over, gently kissing his forehead before getting up and pulling the covers over him. "Sweet dreams."

oOoOo

**Author's Notes: ** Hmm…originally this was gonna be a oneshot but my mind started wandering and I was afraid that if I didn't release part of it and get some feedback then I'd be too lazy to finish it. xD It's sad, but it happens a lot, actually. A few parts of this were even taken from unfinished oneshots that I either lost interest in during the writing process or finished, reread, and thought "Wow, this is crap."

So…just taking a bit of a break and looking for some motivation so that I'll be ready to finish it shortly.

Okay...I don't know if it's Word or this website, but the smushing of my italicized words with my non-italicized words needs to stop. Seriously. -scowls at computer-

Hope you all had a lovely Thanksgiving,

-Emmy :)

One two three four tell me that you love me more.

…you know you want to.


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